07 November 2005

Fear the Net


. Google "miserable failure" and see what appears as result number one. (It's his official website too.)

OH GOD, PLEASE--DON'T LEAVE OUT THE "S". The page balconybox.blogpot.com is freaky f*cked up sh*t. The missing "s" is for Sin. Or Satan. Or Sieglinde. Or Salami.

SHE IS MY DIVA. If these are the kinds of pictures you and your manager choose to represent your various faces, you are worthy of Sieglinde's utter devotion. The Lucia series is particularly Sick.

DEPARTMENT OF IRRITANTS. "Greg" from the Londonist calls Sieglinde's Diaries "irritating." In truth, Sieglinde was really going for "caustic" or at least "lubricating." I won't call their blog "limp" (the British so get more than their share of "impotent" and "small" references), but if "Greg" can only (a) spell La Cieca's real name, and (b) call her the "grandmama" instead of "granddady," then Sieglinde would have been truly insulted. (They give us Camilla, we give them Sieglinde: fair trade practices still in effect across the Atlantic.)

THE SECRET'S OUT. I am cyborg. Hear me roar. That ... mean ... usher ... must ... be ... nullified.

Synthetic Intelligent Entity Generated for Logical Infiltration, Nullification and Dangerous Exploration

UPDATE: (1) I'm told the Londonist can now spell "Jorden." (2) No movement on the "granddaddy" reference as of yet. (Maybe it's a Brit thing.) (3) Meanwhile, we get a clearer picture of who "Greg" is. This is from his official bio: "Greg lost his virginity during a Metropolitan Opera radio broadcast of Aida, was seduced by his first boyfriend with Ariadne auf Naxos, and once had an anonymous sexual encounter in the standing room of the San Francisco Opera during Act 2 of Rigoletto." Hmmm. Sieglinde says comments about this will have to wait for another post; she was just at another Futral Lucia, and there's only room for so much WTF in one day. (Two preliminary questions though: who was the Amneris, and did the Gilda interpolate a high E-flat to end her "Caro nome"?) (4) FYI: Meanwhile still, JSU of AUV ain't gay, and his blog, no matter how fabulous it's become, ain't gay either. (Sieglinde never thought it possible till now.)